Sunday, March 9, 2014

Umbrellas & Butt Wipes

Here's the current lay of the land:

  • Fistula repair definitively failed; another surgery needed.
  • Must choose between a muscle graft (MAJOR surgery) and a permanent ileo (major surgery).
  • Being sent to an IBD surgical specialist for his opinion on which procedure would be better; referral letter was lost (grrrrr!!!!!!) so appointment isn't until April 15.
  • Which means surgery won't be until May. With, depending upon the procedure, a 3 to 12 month recovery period.
  • And we're moving in July.
  • In the meantime, the fistula is acting up more than it has in about a year, causing much discomfort, some pain, and a blasted evil yeast infection. (@#$!@%)
  • The stoma is now tipped flush with my abdominal wall, which means I resemble raw hamburger where it empties. If the surgery isn't until May, I will need a surgical stoma revision in the next few weeks.
  • Abdominal & stoma pain have been plaguing me for a week; the symptoms are beginning to look like adhesions... Which also require a surgical fix.
So yesterday was one of "those" days. Tears, frustration, hopelessness. I sent a whiny missive to a friend who also fights with a chronic illness and used a particularly colourful phrase to describe what I felt like I was dealing with. She responded by saying, "I'll bring the umbrella and butt wipes."

I prefer unscented flushables, but chamomile or aloe will also work!
This, my friends, is what is needed on "those" days: a friend who doesn't roll their eyes, get grossed out, tell you to "just deal with it", or smile tightly. Instead, what is needed is someone with a bit of sass, who understands, is empathetic, but doesn't let you wallow in self-pity either. It's a gift, this ability. And these friends are a HUGE blessing.

Today I feel much better, physically and mentally. Here's what I'm doing to continue to fight:
  • Writing this.
  • Doing laundry (love the fresh smell).
  • Making garlic knots. Because I want to.
  • Sitting in the sun at some point for 10-15 minutes.
  • Plowing ahead with some things I need/want to get done around the house.
  • Counting each little bit I get done as a success.
  • Writing a letter to a friend who really needs a pick-me-up.
  • Praying for those who are in so much more need than me.
  • Goofing around with Boo & Little Toot.
  • Right now, after I post this, I think I might have another cup of tea and a scone.
And maybe, just maybe, I won't need the umbrella today. (I always need the butt wipes!)